I've only done a couple of Astrostarts, but I'm familiar with the JDLPK.
1. Don't know. If the Astro manual says that the wire is to be connected to an immobilizer bypass module, it is probably the right one.
2. A starter kill would require an optional relay, and cutting the car's starter wire in half and connecting it to that relay. Since your Jeep already has Sentry Key, someone is not likely to steal it.
However, you might want to connect it just for the anti-grind feature, so you won't be able to grind the starter when the remote start is already on.
There should be a relay diagram for a starter kill somewhere on this site.
3. Don't know; haven't triggered rear defrost on a Jeep before. Turn the key on, operate the defroster, and listen for a relay clicking. There's a bank of relays above the fusebox; maybe it's there. If so, you can probably just trip the factory relay instead of adding your own.
4. Sounds like that unit has its own onboard doorlock relays----very nice for when you need them, but they can be confusing when you don't. Those six wires are putting terminals 87,87a, and 30 into your hands, so you can wire them up as you wish. On the sticker on the brain, it should show which wire goes to which terminal........
--the 87a wires are not used.
--the two fused wires tied together, they will be either 87 or 30; in either case, tie them to ground.
--the two wires left, they will be 87 or 30; these are your negative doorlock outputs now; connect them to the JDL-PK.
(If you are familiar with relays already......when you hit Lock on the Astro, 87 and 30 are connected; all you're doing is configuring the relays to do what you want.)
5. You can but you shouldn't. If you tied them together, the climate controls would operate whenever you turned the key backward to play the radio.
I'm not familiar with the exact Astro unit you're using, but there is an extra onboard relay to suit your needs, along with a long length of white wire, with two female terminals, with a fuse on one end.
Put the female ends of the wire to 87 and 30 on the onboard relay; doesn't matter which goes where. Cut the white wire in half.
The fused end goes to constant power, the other end goes to the car's accessory wire--------then you must go into the programming menu, and set that onboard relay to act as an accessory.
(NOTE: That RED / black second accessory wire in the Jeep serves to activate the heated seats, and the air-conditioning compressor. If you don't care about either of these features, it would be okay to not power it at all.)
6. I have always just completed the entire install, and made the data connection the LAST connection of the job, and it seems to work out fine. I think I did that with the JDL-PK already plugged in.
7. They make it sound really complicated. There's a Sentry Key pellet inside there, just like what's in your key, and you've got to program it to the car. I think there's a hole on top, right? That should be where the pellet is.
So, what they want you to do is, fire up the ignition with the remote starter, while you hold the pellet up close to the keyhole, to program it.
I do it differently---I perform the install first---mount the ring around the keyhole, wire up the bypass, and so forth.
Then, follow the programming instructions. As long as you did everything right, the ring and the wired-up JDLPK will "show" the Sentry Key pellet to the car, and it should program just fine......if that doesn't work, you can try it their way after.