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Hey Matt, you don't want to tap into the starter wire at all for this curcuit. The wires that you are testing for the starter disable relay would be pin # 85. This wire you will need to attach to another relay in the configuration that I had posted a few posts ago. Also, you better watch out with that probe and using 12 volts to test wires.... your going to burn something out. Always use ( - ) first to test wires. If it is indeed a 12 volt wire then verify it's circuit by placing 12 volts to it not the other way around.

 What do you mean? The akarm has a built in relay, I guess, because I can't find a relay anywhere.......

You wrote :

" I've tried wiring it through a relay, with the starter kill wire on 85, +12 constant on 86, ground on 30, and the activation wire on 87a. THIS DOESN't WORK!!! why?????? How can I do this?"

Use # 85 on this relay that you had from your first post and then attach to another relay in the configuration :

OK, I'm going to try this now...sorry I'm having such a hard time, it's really the first time I've dealt with anything like this (meaning relays...) Thanks for all the help... Just to clarify I'm going to take the starter disable wire and put it on pin 85, put ground to 86 and 87 and the scanner wire on 30.. right?

OK, I wired a relay as in my last post and it KINDA works.... if you touch a ground to the side that the starter disable is connected to, the LED shuts off... It will then stay off until you arm the alarm, and then come on as it should.... The only thing is that it doesn't turn back off when you disarm the alarm.... any help?