neon problem

I think you have your relay wired wrong. if you wire 85 to ground and 86 to fused 12 volt then the relay would turn on right then and stay on. Wire 85 to the alarm trigger and then 86 and 30 to the fused 12 volts. Then run 87 to the positive wire on the noens. Ground the neons to a constant ground and that should do it. If you press the button on the remote the lights will come on but if it is not a latching channel then they will only stay on momenterally or as long as you hold the button depending on your alarm and what channel you have them hooked to. Let me know if that works. You can always make a channel a latching channel too. peace.

I believe that may be your issue, you will need to wire the relay up with:

Try that and let us know... If it doesn't work, can you see if you can hear the relay "clicking"? That would help us in assisting you.

This is a good one.

You are sure that the alarm accessory wire is putting out 12-? Have you used a DMM to test this? Getting a 5-pin relay won't help cause you don't need the NC circuit. I'm inclined to think that the relay is bad but you say that you have tested it?

b)if you do hear a click then try connecting your arm wire to the Pin #85 and arm the alarm. If you don't hear a click then there are issues with your alarm wire. They could be a setup problem, a momentary latching problem, a programming problem or that the wire is not giving 12- when activated.

Let us know what happens and we'll help you through this!