how to wire a relay to do anti grind

I'm having a major brain fart and can't figure this out. I'm installing a basic remote start(avital 4113). The customer requested to have the anti grind feature put on. How do I wire up a relay to allow this for the customer. Thanks.

use the out when runnig or the second ing to a relais that cut the starter when the car is remote started this is a basic installation you shoud be able to figure out hope this will help your installationcocolaboy

use pin 85 to +ign  and pin 86 to out when running or second ing output( - trigger)   then use pin 30 to 1 side of the starter wire that you previously cut to do the anti grid  and attach the the pin 87a to the other  stater wire  dont forget to solder the starter wire of the remote starter to the one going to the car side not the ignition key sidecocolaboy

Then do I connect the starter wire coming from the brain after or before the relay. Or do I attach it to the relay.

As Jac just wrote, to the side going out to the starter.*Installer since '89*

Cool thanks for the help guys. This is why I love this site.