jeeps fog lights with canbus

Trying to solve a riddle: 

State 1:  #1 +12v signal energized, #2 +12v signal not energized. Gadget is on.  Now #2 is energized, which causes #1 to de-energize via canbus, but I want Gadget to stay on. If #2 is then de-energized, #1 is energized and gadget is still on.

State 2: #1 +12v signal is not energized and #2 +12v is not energized. Gadget is off. Now if #2 is energized, gadget should stay off. 

Is this possible?

That's a hard riddle to solve considering I've read through it 7 times and still don't really understand what you are trying to do.

Try replacing  the #x names with actual names, and try replacing "gadget" with what you are trying to control.  I'm guessing the "gadget" is the fog lights from the title, but I'm not totally sure.

If it is fog lights you are trying to control I will tell you right now the easiest way to "take control" of fog lights on newer cars with digital com systems is to install your own fog light relay in parallel with the OEM relay (unless the OEM relays wiring is accessible, then you can just rewire it).  I've done quite a bit of fog light modding on Nissans/Infinitis that use a matrix style multiplexer between the fog light switch and the BCM and then a CAN bus signal between the BCM and the completely integrated IPDM (intelligent power distribution module).  Because of this, there actually arn't fog light relay wires in these cars.  By adding a dedicated relay, in parallel with the output of the OEM relay you can then turn the lights on and off whenever you want (ie any time, whenever fog lights are on, etc) it all depends on how you wire the relay.

It may even be possible to integrate the added relay with the OEM switch, but that will depend on several factors.

In some states it is illegal to run high beams and fogs at the same time - this varies from state to state and can even change from city to city so make sure you check your local laws before doing this.

What I would do is something like this:

I'm not sure if the first relay will need the cap and resistor - it is there to provide a short delay when the fog lights turn off.

I never built or tried this out so I can't guarentee it will work, but it's pretty basic.

If the fog lights are turned on the cap is charged up.  When the fog lights are turned off the cap will keep the relay energized for ~1 second (you can make it shorter by using a smaller cap or a smaller resistor, you probably only need a .25 second delay if any delay at all is needed).

Whenever the fog lights are turned on the coil on the "middle" relay will energize, but nothing else will happen since the high beams arn't on.

When you flip from low beams to high beams the OEM fog light output will shut off, but since the cap is charged it will cause the relay to stay energized for a brief period of time keeping the fog lights on for this brief period.  At the same time the "middle" relay will start conducting power as the high beam signal is running through it.  This high beam signal will keep the added fog light relay energized (top relay).  Since the OEM system uses two seperate relay outputs I added two independent relays for the fog lights.  Chances are you don't need two, but to line up with the OEM schematic I put two in.

Now, if no lights are on (no fogs, no lows, no highs) none of the relays will be energized.  If you immediately flip the high beams on the fogs won't turn on because the "middle" relay isn't energized.  The only way the fogs will turn on when the high beams are turned on is if the fog lights were on before the switch to high beams is made.