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Best Shop Jokes


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Ravendarat 
Platinum - Posts: 2,806
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Joined: February 23, 2004
Location: Canada
Posted: November 20, 2005 at 10:57 AM / IP Logged  
Just wondering what kinda little pranks some of you guys have played on some of the newbies or sales weasels or whoever. Things like sending people to get a box of ohms, not the blue ones but the red ones, or voice coil fluid or the ever popular 6x9 hole saw, or the 4inch to 6x9 adapter plates. I can personal draw a diagram of what a 6x9 hole saw looks like and how it functions to any disbelieverBest Shop Jokes -- posted image.
double-secret reverse-osmosis speaker-cone-induced high-level interference distortion, Its a killer
auex 
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Joined: December 23, 2002
Location: Arizona, United States
Posted: November 20, 2005 at 8:14 PM / IP Logged  
Can't top having the store manager actually calling a customer to tell them their blinker fluid is low. Also had a new installer calling all the stores in the chain for a custom kit maker, he was on the phone for 6 hours.
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menace2sobriety 
Silver - Posts: 394
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Joined: October 29, 2005
Location: United States
Posted: November 21, 2005 at 4:37 AM / IP Logged  

i had one guy run to a parts store to pick up sparkplugs and carb rebuild kit for a diesel. he came back and said they could not find those in the books or computer.

or you could go with a piston return spring how else does the piston come back up?Best Shop Jokes -- posted image. or the classic muffler bearings.    and btw i have a 6x9 hole saw! they are funky things

Asmodeus 
Silver - Posts: 393
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Joined: September 02, 2004
Location: United States
Posted: November 21, 2005 at 10:44 AM / IP Logged  

I like waiting till someone is installing a flip down screen (Especially if they are new) wait till they are about done, Tell them that they have a phone call or something then take some screws cut the head off them and use rubber cement to glue the rest to the top of the car....

When they get back in the shop have like two or 3 other people standing there just staring and muttering about what he/she did to the car....Last guy I did this to was freaking out for like half an hour....

There are also the Skyhooks, and Lugnut gaskets

Best Shop Jokes -- posted image.
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5150azn 
Silver - Posts: 584
Silver spacespace
Joined: June 21, 2004
Location: United States
Posted: November 21, 2005 at 12:11 PM / IP Logged  
Asmodeus wrote:

I like waiting till someone is installing a flip down screen (Especially if they are new) wait till they are about done, Tell them that they have a phone call or something then take some screws cut the head off them and use rubber cement to glue the rest to the top of the car....

When they get back in the shop have like two or 3 other people standing there just staring and muttering about what he/she did to the car....Last guy I did this to was freaking out for like half an hour....

There are also the Skyhooks, and Lugnut gaskets

Thats the classic one.
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gus1 
Gold - Posts: 1,013
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Joined: October 15, 2003
Location: Canada
Posted: November 22, 2005 at 9:51 PM / IP Logged  
Don't forget such classic shopping items as:
- The Wire or Board stretcher
- Plaid or checkered paint
- Metric Crescent Wrench
- Adjustable Metric Wrench (see above)
- For the Americans.... send the FNG to Home Depot to get a Robertson Screwdriver (Canadians, keep the snickering to a minimum please)
- Your parts distributor always appreciates the call for a price on a flux capacitor
There are a few decent in house pranks you can pull as well:
- When FNG is going out drinking on a work night, you can have a lot of fun the next morning with a piezo mini siren, a drill battery, a couple of NC magnetic reed switches, and his/her toolbox.
- Send them on the coffe run, make sure to ask for one coffee that is extra black
- Wiring a co-worker's horn or alarm siren to the "mist" function of their wipers is always good for a laugh.... 2 extra points if you use a latching relay....
- Firecrackers are always fun when they are putting that fuse into the underhood fuseholder... all you need is one to watch them hit the roof
- Even better if they are doing any soldering/drilling near the fuel tank
Best Shop Jokes -- posted image.
There are quite a few more good ones.....
We had one kid going pretty good at the plant I used to work in. There was this hole in the celing that we snuck a rope through (firmly attatched to a beam, of course) and had dangling there. We told him that he had to pull it twice every 15min to keep something or other running, or else there would be problems in the production area.
He pulled that thing like clockwork for a day and a half until we finally let him off the hook (well, and the senior management wondered what the hell he was doing when they walked through one morning)
Good times.... good times..
Gus
Wherever I go, that is where I end up......
KPierson 
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Joined: April 14, 2005
Location: Ohio, United States
Posted: November 22, 2005 at 10:26 PM / IP Logged  

I once programmed a spare remote to a salesguy's remote start (it so happened to be a used unit he bought from the manager).  We would remote start it every couple hours.  We told him that we thought he had a frozen coil spring in the remote start unit, that was most likely caused by the brain sitting out in the rain before he got the unit (it was winter in Ohio so everything was frozen).  We seriously about had the guy in tears. 

Don't forget the old trick of hooking the horn to the brake signal.  Thats a classic.

I actually took the time to improve that prank by building a control unit that would keep track of how many times the brake pedal was pushed.  On the 10th press it would randomly select one of four patterns to honk the horn.  The unit would also pick one of the four patterns if the brake was held down for longer then 45 seconds.  This was installed on a Store managers car at CC.  It was an instant classic!

Kevin Pierson
alpine0000 
Copper - Posts: 160
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Joined: July 06, 2005
Location: Virginia, United States
Posted: November 23, 2005 at 11:40 AM / IP Logged  

back when i was an installer, there was this kid whod come in everyday and loiter around the store. probly like once a month, hed have a do something small to his car. one of our installers, todd, would get really annoyed with the kid cause hed come in every day, ask an hours worth of questions and leave.

ill never forget the day todd had to work on his car. todd comes up to the front and tells the kid "man, we cant work on our car anymore. not only is your gweebo disk bad, but the caniveling pin is loose too. your going to have to take it somewhere else. we dont stock those parts."

he had the kid calling around to see who could fix gweebo disks and caniveling pins Best Shop Jokes -- posted image.

godblessdremil 
Silver - Posts: 273
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Joined: August 03, 2005
Location: United States
Posted: November 25, 2005 at 1:53 AM / IP Logged  
Well back at the shop we convert those huge house zip ties into snakes. Well we bought a new pack to make some, so me and a fellow installer combined 2 and zip tied our boss to one of the columns in the garage. Took him like an hour to get out of it.
forbidden 
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Joined: November 01, 2003
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posted: November 26, 2005 at 5:55 PM / IP Logged  
So I guess duct taping the noob installer to a stop sign doesn't count? nothing like leaving him 4 feet off of the ground and unable to free himself. (Don't piss off the boss is what it comes down to, especially when the boss is double your size, hehe).
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